good god yvonne strahovski, LOOK AT YOUR FAAAAAAACE

[elapses]

HEY GUYS KNOW WHAT I LOVE? SPIES WHO SUCK AT FEELINGS!!!!

SARAH: Who are you Agent Shaw? Because you know, I have never heard of you and neither has Casey. You're a very well-kept secret.
SHAW: I do like my secrets. Don't you? Being the daughter of a con man teaches you that.
SARAH: You really do read everybody's files, don't you?
SHAW: Of course, and I have a few questions for you. Seven months ago, when Chuck was in Prague you went off-grid for three days. This is a surveillance photo of a hotel in Lisbon. This... is you. Beckman ordered you to stay in contact, but you ran. Why?

SARAH: It's not what you think.
SHAW: I don't know what to think. Are you a double agent? A Ring operative? Or is this about Chuck?

SHAW: I do everything I can to protect my people. I lost one spy. It was my fault. And it will never happen again. ...why were you in Lisbon?
SARAH: I went to bury Bryce, my partner. He wanted his ashes there, Lisbon was our first mission. Anyway I wasn't supposed to leave but I promised him I would take care of it so I did. If you want me out just tell Beckman and she'll reassign me.
SHAW: Why would I do that. I need you. I just had to be sure that the Ring hadn't gotten to you already.
SARAH: And now do you believe me?
SHAW: Every word, Sarah.

SARAH: What's in the envelope, Shaw?

SHAW: She was killed by a Ring agent five years ago. Her name was Evelyn Shaw. Eve. We both made the same mistake, Sarah. We fell in love with spies.

All I can think about when I watch that last scene is this line from Marina & the Diamonds' "I Am Not A Robot" that goes "can you teach me how to feel -- real?" which is so obvious I guess, I think it's in the particular delivery. Motherfucker the whole Prague thing was totally a gimmicky writing thing but you can't help but translate it into real (fake) feelings: because this time he wasn't a spy, was he Sarah Walker? And yet here you are all the same.

BUT ANYWAY HEY GUYS I... REALLY KIND OF WANT THEM TO HAVE DELICIOUS ANGSTY SPY SEX (dudes, Shaw is totally one of the miniscule 1% of the male population for whom manpain is actually kind of attractive rather than annoying, because he is not into feelings and therefore he does not like to throw his inner turmoil in your face! THANK GOD, it has been so long since we have encountered an honest-to-god graduate of the Ryan Atwood Brooding school) (AND THEY HAVE TENSION) (AND YEAH, I HAVE FEELINGS).

Um so who's seen tonight's Life Unexpected?

Comments

[http://users.livejournal.com/spyglass_/]

THIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIS 100%. Bonus points for the Ryan Atwood Brooding school.


It's 2 AM here and I just sent you the mother of all Homefront emails, so this is pretty much the best comment I can come up with right now, other than to add a vote for tonight's Life Unexpected. I kind of want to take over Lux' room, although if I were her, I would probably take down the Spin Doctors poster because that would creep me out. I seriously love the bong lamp though.

[elapses.livejournal.com]

I AM SLOWLY WORKING ON THE HOMEFRONT EMAIL. I mean do not get me wrong, I am delighted at the length of it!!! And unlike you I never had ANYONE to discuss these feelings with! I am just saying.

LOL, the Spin Doctors poster! I can't believe Cate even SAID THAT. It would be darling if it was just sort of there and Lux was just kind of "..." about it, but since she knows what it means: ewwwwww, who wants to know that about their MOM AND DAD. But lol the bong lamp, YES. And god that room, SO GORGEOUS.

[thecolorbetween.livejournal.com]

I HAVE FEELINGS, TOO; I AGREE WITH THIS POST; I HAVE NOT SEEN LIFE UNEXPECTED; SORRY FOR SHOUTING; THANK YOU AND GOOD NIGHT; P.S. I LIKE SHAW, I LIKE HIM, I LIKE YOU, BRANDON ROUTH, I LIKE YOU, OKAY, AU REVOIR FOR NOW, OR TTFN, AS THEY SAY.

[elapses.livejournal.com]

OKAY CLAIRE, DO YOU KNOW HOW OFTEN, WHEN I OPEN MY COMPUTER AND IT'S THE PASSWORD SCREEN, IT SAYS "! CAPSLOCK IS ON"? Because it's depressingly a lot. I barely consider it shouting. BUT OH MY GOD I KNOWWWWW, I JUST!!!! LIKE THEM SO MUCH. Too bad they're probably going to end up breaking my heart.

[thecolorbetween.livejournal.com]

CONFESSION: I USUALLY DON'T DO CAPSLOCK, I JUST PRESS THE SHIFT BUTTON, I REALLY DON'T KNOW WHY, AND APOSTROPHES AND THE LIKE CAN COMPLICATE THINGS SOMETIMES. I also don't hate Chuck/Hannah?! WHATEVER, I TEND TO SHIP ATTRACTIVE PEOPLE WITH ATTRACTIVE PEOPLE. Hello, good sir, Shaw, sir, Daniel Shaw, 'ELLO, 'ELLOOOO. I was not expecting that confession re: Eve to come so soon?! IDK, IDK, WHATEVS. (But I'm embarrassed to ask: Was she really burying Bryce? I got kind of lost. I thought he was asking about Prague and then he was asking about Lisbon, so I got confused.)

P.S. I WATCHED LIFE UNEXPECTED. Kristoffer Polaha, please let this show last, I have liked you since North Shore — YEAH, THAT FOX SHOW SET IN HAWAII, YEAH — and I watched many a failed show for you, so...YEAH. PLEASE WEAR COLLARED SHIRTS AND JEANS MORE OFTEN, KTHXL8RZ.

[elapses.livejournal.com]

I USED TO DO THAT! Until capslock became my primary method of communication, I guess. And I liked Chuck/Hannah tooooo, actually. SHE REALLY IS SO PRETTY!! I don't know it was just different: I liked them a lot, but Shaw/Sarah is giving me ALL THESE IMMENSE FEELINGS. (Also I am not 100% sure, to be honest. I mean I am sure she was lying -- I don't think she would have gone off-grid just to bury Bryce, and when you're a spy Lisbon and Prague aren't that far apart -- but I also think it's possible that was part of it? Like, bury Bryce in Lisbon, run off to fetch Bartowski in Prague. Or it could have been the other way around. Or it could have been a lie, and Lisbon could have been her way of throwing them off. WHO KNOWS, Sarah Walker is a mysterious lady!)

OH MAN I NEVER NORTH SHORE -- I REMEMBER AMANDA RIGHETTI BEING ATTACHED TO IT THOUGH -- but I am glad to know he is one of your dudes. I like his face a LOT. I like him a lot. He is perfect for this part.

[thecolorbetween.livejournal.com]

farahdoodles said that Kristin Kreuk ends every sentence as if she's going to laugh, and I was like, WHOA, BIGGEST COMPLIMENT EVER AND SO, SO TRUE (I actually haven't told her that yet, I should). I just rewatched the long promo that aired after 3x03, where there was a lot of Shaw/Sarah doing things and making me all giggly. CONFLICT, BUT ONLY SORT OF? IDK, IDK, HE'S REALLY ATTRACTIVE, I LIKE HIM AND HIS FACE AND HAIR AND OH, THOSE GLASSES, LET US NOT FORGET THOOOOOSE. (Yeah, I thought that Bryce burying thing came out of nowhere and would have come up in conversation at another point if it were true, but as you say, who knows?)

YES, AMANDA RIGHETTI KIND OF GOT IN THE WAY ON THAT SHOW. It was one of those shows with that had an "afterlife" on another, non-U.S. network, so I found them on some eBay-type website, and GOOD LORD, THE ENDING WAS SO RIDICULOUS AND STUPID AND YOU DO NOT BLOW JASON MATTHEWS' CAR UP RIGHT AFTER HE GOT MARRIED, YOU JUST DON'T. There's this one scene in an earlier episode that had me on the floor with *~*sexay delight*~* (oh my goodness, most awkward thing I have ever written), and I'm pretty sure I still have it on my ReplayTV. I must, must find it. HE IS A GOOD WHISPERER. I like his face A LOT, TOO, ALEX, IT'S APPROPRIATE FOR THIS ROLE/MY FACE LIKING TIMES. (P.S. I still have approximately 68 pictures left to go through/edit for my Joshua picspam, it is both really awesome and SUPER OVERWHELMING.)

[elapses.livejournal.com]

Ohhhhhhhhhhh, SO TRUE!!!! And you are right, such a lovely compliment. I am so glad we get her for awhile (is Smallville even still on?) buttttt I desperately want her to have her own great show, where she does not have to be the fandom's #1 hated lady. BUT IDK, I AM NOT THAT CONFLICTED, TBH. These love interests don't feel gimmicky to me the way past ones have because for once, I just... don't want Chuck/Sarah. I will probably/hopefully loop back around at some point, but right noooooow I am more focused on Shaw and Sarah and their EMOTIONALLY RETARDED SPY TENSION.

THE ENDING WAS SO RIDICULOUS AND STUPID AND YOU DO NOT BLOW JASON MATTHEWS' CAR UP RIGHT AFTER HE GOT MARRIED, YOU JUST DON'T
That is SO MEANNNNNN, I hate how so many finales of cancelled shows are like that. Bitterness isn't pretty on anyone guys! Ngth I kind of want to see the *~*sexay delight*~* moment though. Hmm. (!!!!!!!!! that! Is going to end up being so deliciously colossal!)

[thecolorbetween.livejournal.com]

I think she left Smallville a few years ago, but I'm not sure. She seems adorable, and you're right, she should have a show where she isn't the target of everyone's hatred. I actually never mind Chuck with other ladies, because I know that none of them is that serious of a threat in the long run. I liked Lou more than Jill, but that's really only because Jill gave me bad vibes.

That is SO MEANNNNNN, I hate how so many finales of cancelled shows are like that.
SO MEAN, UGH. It makes me wish I had never seen it. I ACTUALLY FOUND THE SCENE ON YOUTUBE! It's in Italian, so it doesn't work as well, and you really just get Jason/Nicole making out rather than Jason being all whispery, but WHATEVAH. It's here (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YnQOJfuDNtc&feature=PlayList&p=BC8CFA77B601A469&playnext=1&playnext_from=PL&index=69); the scene starts at 6:45 (he's shirtless at the very beginning of part 2 *~*if you're into that*~*.) (I knooow, it will be epic, but it's tiring! That was meant to sound really whiny, unfortunately.)

[shimmeryshine.livejournal.com]

HER FAAAAACE. I am not on board for sexing (I'LL NEVER BE READY LOL), but I do love what he's bringing out in her a lot. If they're going to do it though, angsty spy sex would be infinitely better than ~falling in love.

[elapses.livejournal.com]

HAHAHA I FIGURED EVERYONE WOULD BE LIKE "...OKAY ALEX!!! You weirdo!" but we would all still feel the same way about her FACE. Her faaaaaaaace!

[goldenmelisande.livejournal.com]

OH MY GOD THERE IS NOTHING I LOVE MORE THAN SPIES CATCHING FEELINGS. NOTHING. I like...can't even express in words how much I love them, I feel like a traitor (okay not really, not my fault the writers made me need to take a little break from Chuck/Sarah) but ANGSTY REPRESSED EMOTIONALLY RETARDED SPIES, ALEX. I LOVE ALL OF THESE THINGS SO MUCH. I am still trying to get over the fact that I am 100% into Shaw's manpain (he's so brooding! And not whiny! ♥__♥) and that I'm about five seconds away from doodling these two's names all over my notebooks with little hearts.

GOD, MY LIFE.

alsoooooooo Life Unexpected got uploaded to Megaupload so I'm downloading it now!!!

[elapses.livejournal.com]

CATHERINE I JUST -- WHY ISN'T THERE FIC???

[goldenmelisande.livejournal.com]

BECAUSE THIS IS CHUCK. THERE IS NEVER FIC. But ugh CATCHING FEELINGS is one of my faaaaaaaaavorite things, THERE IS NOTHING BETTER THAN SPIES HAVING THEIR COLD HEARTS MELTED. I still can't believe Chuck spent ALL THAT TIME breaking down all Sarah's crazy spy walls AND THEN DOUCHED OUT AT THE PIVOTAL MOMENT. What is that, Bartowski. LIKE, I mean...I don't want to say I don't ship them anymore because I know that it could change, but that totally cheapened (? idk if that's the word I want there) their relationship for me- she was willing to give up everything and he wasn't, and to me that says a lot. I don't want to be this final about it, but at the same time I don't know if it's going to affect my feelings towards them for a while or if I'll get over it some time soon? BUT MAAAAAAAAAAN, RIGHT NOW I JUST WANT TO WATCH SARAH AND SHAW HAVE FEELINGS AND BE BROODING AND CONFLICTED ABOUT SAID FEELINGS, like that is what I want more than anything else from this show at the moment.

[elapses.livejournal.com]

I CAN'T BELIEVE IT EITHER. And like, idk, weirdly making this picspam gave me this funny residual Chuck/Sarah feeling (I mean obviously not really at all, you know what I mean) because I always loved the way the Bryce/Sarah/Chuck triangle worked, the way Chuck trumped Bryce so effortlessly and meanwhile he had no idea. And I knowwww he didn't know the extent of it, but he knew enough and he threw her away. AND THEN THERE IS SHAW, SO YES, LET'S GET SOME NICE BROODING SPY SEX WITH ALL THESE WEIRD COMPLICATED FEELINGS!!!!

BTW BREAD IS IN THE OVEN, PRAY FOR ME

[goldenmelisande.livejournal.com]

Yes exactly! And like, ugh the whole thing is just SO MESSED UP, Sarah buried Bryce and lost Chuck and I don't think Chuck...gets it. I REALLY WISH HE HADN'T SAID THAT STUPID THING ABOUT WANTING TO SAVE THE WORLD OR WHATEVER, ugh it just sounded so selfish. WHY COULDN'T HE HAVE JUST SAID THAT HE COULDN'T LEAVE HIS SISTER AND HIS BROTHER-IN-LAW AND HIS FRIENDS? Then I wouldn't be so fucking bitter. OH MY GOD THOUGH, BROODING SPY SEX WITH BONUS FEELINGS AND SUBSEQUENT PANIC/ANGST OVER THEIR FEELINGS, DO WANT. IF WE GET NOTHING ELSE FROM THIS ARC, I AT LEAST WANT A REALLY ATTRACTIVE, WELL-LIT, WELL-SOUNDTRACKED SEX SCENE. Considering that the Sarah/Shaw thing will undoubtedly end in pain, I THINK THE WRITERS COULD AT LEAST GIVE ME THAT.

YOU'RE ~IN MY THOUGHTS~ BB, tbh I'm super impressed that you're even attempting. Of course, I can barely make toast, sooooo. EVERYTHING COOKING/BAKING-RELATED IS IMPRESSIVE TO ME. I legit fuck up the Lipton soup like every other time I make it, I'm constantly getting the number of cups of water wrong. EMBARRASSING BUT TRUE.

[elapses.livejournal.com]

I really don't think he does either. AND THAT IS WHY I'M SO NOT OKAY WITH CHUCK/SARAH RIGHT NOW. I don't know, this whole spy thing is so effing immature: this new intersect has turned him into a little boy with a stupid toy who is too shortsighted to remember to think about anyone else. BUT OMG YESSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS, WELL-LIT SEX SCENE. Y PLEASE.

Tbh I've already screwed up three times (the dough wasn't smooth, the loaves were kind of lame, and I accidentally put them in the oven once when they were supposed to rise again... lol my life) but hopefully it'll be okay.

[goldenmelisande.livejournal.com]

Yes immature is exactly it! He isn't thinking about the consequences of what he's doing, and like...I don't dislike his character or anything (I find him perfectly tolerable unless it's a scene related to Chuck/Sarah, and then I get really annoyed) but it means that I don't want to see Chuck/Sarah right now because he just isn't in the right place for it. IT'S GOING TO TAKE ME A WHILE TO GET OVER THE PRAGUE THING TBH, I'M STILL ANGRY. I want to see Chuck get more mature about everything, I want to see Ellie find out (spy family!!!), I kind of want him to have an adorable thing with Kristin Kreuk (if she's a Ring agent I will be SO. PISSED. dnw Jill part two), and most importantly I want to see Shaw catch Feelings from Sarah.

Oh god making bread sounds so scary/hard, jfc.

[elapses.livejournal.com]

Yeah. Exactly! In a weird way it's kind of endearing that he's so enamored with the spy stuff, just... stay away from Sarah. AND WHEN THEY GIVE EACH OTHER LONGING LOOKS I HATE EVERYTHING, I just... need this to not be a thing for awhile. I wanttttt all the things you want too. Surprise! Also yeah, I reaaaaaaaally don't want Kristen to be Ring. COME ON WRITERS, THE BUY MORE HAS REGRESSED US ENOUGH THIS SEASON.

IT WAS ACTUALLY REALLY EASYYYYYYY JUST... took a long time? In a waiting sense. If I can do it you probably could. I was you a year ago, dude.

[goldenmelisande.livejournal.com]

OH GOD THE LONGING LOOKS ARE THE WORST. Actually for me the worst was the fact that what WOULD have been an adorable Ellie/Sarah girl talk scene ended up being a gross "let's talk about you and Chuck!" scene. AND THE PART WHERE SARAH WATCHED CHUCK'S STUPID SPEECH ABOUT LOVING HER AND CRIED, I WAS SO ANGRY AT THAT ENTIRE ...PLOT. SCENE. WHATEVER. And okay re: regression, at least Chuck is sick of the Buy More too? Maybe that means they'll actually get rid of it at some point. IT SERVES NO PURPOSE, THE BUY MORE PLOTS DON'T EVEN CONNECT TO CHUCK'S PLOTS ANYMORE SO THERE IS NO POINT except apparently to make me want to die.

Maybe next year when I (presumably) have a kitchen, I will try to start making things!

[jenaben.livejournal.com]

I AGREE WITH THIS ENTIRE POST SO MUCH, ALEX. There are very very few things I like better than spies who accidentally suddenly have feelings, and Brandon Roooouuuuth, how do you make brooding look so good?!? (A+++ FOR THE RYAN ATWOOD BROODING SCHOOL, ALEX. IT ALSO HELPS THAT THIS IS THE SCHWARTZVERSE: MR. J. SHWARTZ IS GOOD AT FINDING THE GOOD KIND OF BROODERS.)

I HAVE SEEN LAST NIGHT'S LIFE UNEXPECTED AND I CONTINUE TO ADORE IT. Found familyyyy and Lux's wonderful attic room and Kerr Smith continuing to be as warm and jovial as he was 10 years ago and I LOVE EVERY ONE OF THEM. Except for maybe Lux's boyfriend, but I'm sure the show will make him delightful soon enough, I am not worried.

[elapses.livejournal.com]

I AM REALLY GLAD!!!! I kind of felt like everyone else was going to be off, still in their Chuck/Sarah camps and I just... cannot be into them now. I'm not ready again. But oh man SPIES ACCIDENTALLY HAVING FEELINGS, yeeeeees, and hot damn Routh's Annapolis shirt. That... was pretty lovely!

I thought the same thing about the Schwartzverse! Seriously it's strange, there is almost nothing that can turn me off an episode or a movie or whatever faster than MANPAIN in almost any form, but Schwartz has some kind of magic touch. HE KNOWS HOW TO DO THESE THINGS.

Oh man, YES YES YES. It is so loooooovely, and I do love Kerr Smith still. Also everyone! Oh god my heart broke and then rose back up so many times for one forty-minute period: especially, god, the looks that passed between Baze (is that how we spell that?) and Lux when Cate was named primary caregiver. HE TOTALLY WANTS TO BE A DAD, IT'S KIND OF THE GREATEST.

[book-babe.livejournal.com]

(I am apparently in a Chuck/Sarah camp still, let's not talk about it, don't judge meee. However I agree with the general consensus that I don't want them nowwwwww, but still.)

Chucks an asshole? Really?!

[knightrid3r]

Seriously people? Yeah Chuck made one big fuck up but thats nothing compared to everything Sarah did to him. Still love the Sarah character but man she was a bitch sometimes. As far as Prague goes for all Chuck knew she was running with him because she felt obligated as his handler to protect him. I mean before Bryce died Chuck thought she was leaving with him and she never said otherwise, so to Chuck it could have just seemed like he was her second choice because Bryce died. And honestly how long would they have lasted on the run and how long would it have taken for Sarah to start resenting Chuck for being the reason she is no longer with the CIA. Or at least thats what I would think if I were Chuck. In my opinion Chuck messed up but it is understandable why he did what he did he could have just explained a little better.

Sarah on the other hand asked for a reassignment after Chuck told her he loved her, dated Shaw (yes Chuck dated Hannah), she told Shaw her real name after knowing him for a few months while she didn't tell Chuck one real thing about her the three years she knew him (BITCH), said she couldn't be with or love Chuck if he had killed someone (she was with Bryce then Shaw; they both killed people! - and she has killed many people and Chuck still always loved her unconditionally), she didn't trust him when he said he didn't kill the mole (Chuck blindly trusted her for 3 years but the first time he asks she says no), she didn't run with him to Mexico (yeah this ones small because she wanted to but really she couldn't get away from Shaw to go tell Chuck, she HAD to go with him? C'mon).

You people are saying how Chuck fucked up? Yeah he did but Sarah FUCKED UP!!!! on multiple occasions thereby negating Chucks fuck up by a lot of fuck ups. Still love Sarah but damn girl you fucked up a lot. Rant officially over.